Kidney Disease...The Power of Prayer

          Looking back to January 2013 I could hardly

believe the words out of the doctor's mouth. “You have

stage five renal failure with 10% of your kidneys

functioning.” He said it was not “life-threatening,” but

that was not true. After researching it on the internet I

found that it was indeed life threatening, and if I did

not go on dialysis the disease would be fatal. Something

needed to be done immediately.

          I was sent to a kidney specialist. A true God-send

for me. She is one of the best in her field, and I was truly

blessed the day she came into my life. She did a lot of

tests from head to toe to rule out causes. She immediately

had me get an iron infusion and a Procrit shot to help do

what my kidneys could no longer do.

         During this time I prayed for a miracle and expected

one. I believed I had faith to have one, since I had

previously experienced major health scares. Maybe

I was praying for the wrong thing.

         My prayers for a miracle were ongoing. I had

Priesthood blessings which gave me much peace and

comfort. I had many people praying for me which filled

me with gratitude for such love, support, and being

alive.

          However, I did not feel my prayers were being

heard. That was one of the hardest times through this

experience. I had previously received fast answers to

my prayers that I was shocked when I felt I wasn't

receiving any answers. That went on for three months

with no answers. It felt dark, and I hated that void in

my life...not feeling that my Heavenly Father was right

there with me. During that time I had some depressed

days; Let's call them “pity party” days. Thank goodness

they were few and far between, but I learned and grew

through them all.

           One thing I discovered was that I needed to

mourn the loss of my kidneys like the death of a loved

one. I was going through the emotions without realizing

it, essentially experiencing the five stages of grief.

            I was lucky. I went through the denial, some

depression, and then acceptance. Most of the time, I

just wanted to know what Heavenly Father wanted me

to learn from this so that I could move on. However,

I quickly learned that my time was different than His,

things were on His timetable, he had numerous things

for me to experience. It was going to be an interesting

journey..,